|
|
Thursday, October 1st, 2009
|
|
|
SUP LIVEJOURNAL, WHERE ARE YOU GUYS.
I NEED SOME FRIENDS.
|
|
Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
|
|
Tuesday, March 31st, 2009
|
|
|
so I'm really hungry.
hot pockets sound pretty good.
is kroger worth it?
|
|
Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
|
|
|
holy crap.
i guess i'm not really blown away by how much of a little faggot i was.
but wow.
|
|
Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
|
|
|
college.
a needy ex.
where is love now?
i'm not dead.
|
|
Comments: Add Your Own.
|
|
Sunday, September 24th, 2006
|
|
|
I'm disappointed with my previous entries, I can't even remember...
I feel so much more grown up now, as cliche as it sounds. I don't have to say fuck or goddamn to emphasize what I mean. I don't use. o_O o_O;;;; o-o;;; ;o;
There's no more *verb*... it's all gone, I grew out of it.
Reading back... also reminded me of how much I didn't like being... me, who I was, where I was, doing the things I was doing. It was good to move.
Though this thing.. is old, old. The longest running record of me that's pretty concise with how I was feeling and when. I didn't know that I had stopped and restarted Final Fantasy XI again, in 2004. Which means, I had been playing it in 2003. I'm playing it now, or at least have been in the last week, which means that game has kept on being played by me... for forever. Well, 3 years. And then there's other games and things that I've done, that feel... when they first come to mind, that feel like I only did them yesterday.
But I've forgotten so much, that's why it feels like that.
Being cynical has developed a new meaning for me, it's not a way of life, it's a mood for the day. I hardly ever use that word, and I apparently had a big fixation with it before. There's motivation, and people to be around now. Places to go to, people to see, things to achieve. I guess it was just a tough time.
I don't miss it.
It's been a nice weekend to sit and think, and dream, man have I dreamed. Some people that used to really matter before, three or four years ago now have such a tiny impact on my life it's absolutely absurd to think that they had any clasp on it before.
Like Elizabeth, my first, real, albeit, middle school girlfriend. Used to think she was the best girl to ever happen to me, she's the only girl I've ever changed myself for, or at least, what I wore.
I didn't do it again after that.
Now, she's an annoying phone call. And irritating chatter that couldn't hold a complete thought in person if she tried, not that she ever does. I figure it's just a form of nervousness, or a built up way of hiding how she really feels, cause that's just how she is. And it makes sense to her, so why not do it.
Then there's... Margo?
Depressing is all that is, on both our accounts. But we're better away. Neither of us would probably be who and what we are now if not for the other one, though we'd probably have turned out better had we never started sending messages over deviantart.
We've both slowly gone through teenage stages, sometimes outgrowing things simultaneously. But we've distanced, it's high school. She lies to me now, and I do to her, every now and then. She lies to me about her boyfriend, never mentions having one of these, or that I should ever take a glance at them. She tells me what she has to, enough to complain about, but not enough to talk to me anymore. I'm the same way, I don't really want to talk to her most of the time. I lie to her in that I don't talk to her enough, always keeping things - like this for instance - more subdued and reserve, as if it's some great well of eternal life, savoring it for those who 'deserve' it, I guess.
For all she's been through with me, she deserves nothing less.
but instead, we go on lying to each other, keeping what really matters from each other, and then somehow getting into a fight over what was never even mentioned.
but now, it's 2:45 am, and I'm rather tired, 2:46. Been typing for too long.
I wonder if this will ever be deleted.
|
|
Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
|
|
|
it happened, a full year before I posted in this again.
Apparently there are some... well, not really friends on here.
Kind of funny.
oh yeah, hey guys.
|
|
Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
|
| Time: | 9:40 am. |
| Mood: |  funf. | | Music: | Sigur Ros - Njosnavelin. |
|
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
went to the air show in my home town, was kinda boring, I saw rachel but she dissappeared into the crowd before I had a chance to say anything.
Heh, sometimes I wonder about living back home, here. What it would've been like. And then I'm hit with a wave of nostalgia where I almost care about what would've happened, and I miss my old friends. Although, I doubt I could've gone any other way, I had to stop being a jackass, I had to grow up. To do that, I had to move away, get away from the confinement of the same old town, the same old room, the same people.
But regardless of where you move, your life will still be fairly fucked, but at least I can happily enjoy it now. And sadly, it seems I'm beginning to hate things that remind me of people, or how I used to be. Especially other people that act the same way, they're irritating and I wish they would realize it. But it's almost like a child's innocence, they don't realize it and they still enjoy themselves.
This is just sort of a good luck to any of my old friends that read this.
Elizabeth, Spencer, Kalie, Forrest, Gabby, Mary, Caitlin, Rachel, Sarah, Kathleen, Robert, Jesse, and everyone else that thought I was a pompous dick.
In a sad way I do miss you guys, and I hope you are still having fun.
|
|
Comments: Add Your Own.
|
|
Monday, January 17th, 2005
|
|
|
I've got a bunch of stuff to do...
and a bunch of stuff I should be doing.
I don't know, life is boring now.
|
|
Comments: Add Your Own.
|
|
Wednesday, December 29th, 2004
|
|
|
OH YEAH OH YEAH, FOR ANYONE WHO IS GENERALLY PLEASED WITH NICE PICTURES
I'm gonna be coming back with some christmas drawings/presents wtfever
so yeah, just post here and i'll draw you, provided I can find some paper
er, well draw you a picture, any requests are fine too
...oh fuck me
|
|
Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
|
|
|
yeah so I went to gamestop today and I bought 3 games
it was irritating to buy them because here in new mexico, even though I feel like I'm being racist
there were like, these 3 mexican kids, looked maybe 9-10 years old, swearing every couple words, right
so I go look around store, I had a good idea of what I was gonna get, and god knows, that every where i wanted to look, those three little shits were right there
of course this one really cocky motherfucker would always hover maybe 5 inches from me, and i'd glance at him and he go off for a bit, but he'd come right back
goddamn, i don't hate mexicans, i hate mexicans like that, cocky little assholes
anyways, so I pick out my 3 games Bujingai, Beyond Good and Evil and Resident Evil: Outbreak which added up to approx 87 dollars
moving on, I go to cash register and that little bastard comes up looks at me like I'm some idiot (course the whole store thought i was some loser poor ass kid just window shopping), and just sits there smug
thankfully, i was in a good mood because I was getting beyond good and evil for like 20 dollars, otherwise I would've knocked his ass to the floor
the cash register... asshole I guess was amazed that I had a hundred dollar bill (he said something about me not being able to afford all of this, but I wasn't listening)
so yeah, good experience, that gamestop blows ass, besides being a good cheap place.
so right now that racks up my christmas list to be a bit noteworthy I guess
list~
Bujingai: The Forsaken City
Resident Evil: Outbreak (actually I would've bought one of the RE games for the gamecube, but the store didn't have it, hopefulyl walmart or some place will have RE0 or RE for cheap)
Tony Hawk's Underground
Beyond Good and Evil
Titan A.E.
Resident Evil Apocalypse
Yeah Yeah Yeahs Live in San Fransico
Fever to Tell
The Greatest Story Ever Told
Revolutions Per Minute
THAT OTHER FUCKING CD
new stereo
guitar kit
compter chair
mp3 player 1 gb
guitar stand
hmm. that's pretty much the major stuff, I guess it's nice having a split family now.
gahd i'm so spoiled, or maybe lucky I dunno
fuck me
|
|
Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
|
|
Tuesday, December 28th, 2004
|
|
|
oh yeah just for the record
i am fucking horny as hell
and i can't do anything about it right now. :(
|
|
Comments: Add Your Own.
|
|
|
Okay so I'm in New Mexico and I have a second christmas, right.
Well, I got liek, 270 something dollars because my family didn't know what to get me. Probably the most.. prominent gifts were, of course, the money, Titan A.E. dvd and uh... well shit, the rest has just kinda blurred out of my mind this late in the night.
Oh well, so I go out a buy some CDs right. I bought Fever to Tell (final-fucking-lee), the Greatest Story Ever Told, Revolutions per Minute and another Rise Against CD (name escapes me, but it has State of the Union and Paper Wings on it.) So yeah, a Yeah Yeah Yeahs CD, a Lawrence Arms CD and two Rise Against ones. Then I went out and got a 7 dollar DVD of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs live at San Fransico (Filmore?)
Hm, my mom got a Steppen Wolf and Led Zeppelin cd, she better hope I don't swipe them.
Also managed to get Resident Evil: Apocalypse, since the big display case in Best Buy was pretty hard to miss. It was alright, but like a review I think Speed wrote, Alice had become too much of a fan character. Even though compared to a lot of movies, this was shit, I was satisfied with it. And goddamn, Jill is just totely awesome. I liked the black dude too, he was funny. But I was satisfied in more of a way than the first, even though the first may have been a better movie, I wasn't all 'argh shit, no, no damnit, GODDAMNIT, GIVE THE PEOPLE A FUCKING BREAK'. This ending was more of '...okay, umbrella needs to know when to fucking quit, because I don't wanna have to shell out more mney to see another movie. :(' And jesus, she wouldn't die either, although seeing Milla Jovovich naked, as if I already haven't, was a bit entertaining at the end, so it balanced out the wtf-ness about it.
but I am pleased in my late night stupor in watching this movie.
I also conquered Silent Hill 3 again, on normal, again, so I can get ready for hard. God knows I should probably beat it more times so I can get more bullets. :x
So yeah, it's kinda boring here, I have about half of my money left, probably gonna spend it on more music or some RE games to entertain myself while I'm here.
Does anyone read this?
|
|
Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
|
|
Tuesday, December 7th, 2004
|
| Subject: | sup |
| Time: | 8:53 pm. |
| Mood: |  smokin'. | | Music: | the Grateful Dead - Truckin'. |
|
argh this girl keeps iming me and it's annoying me to death, but I'm too nice to block her
and uh... got back from art lesson's seth's awesome although him and tyler teased me about asking aimee out
if I wasn't chicken shit I would, my friends would be so fucking jealous
...uh yeah, life's still kinda sucking, but I'm going home with tyler on thursday, and geo homework to do,kbi
|
|
Comments: Add Your Own.
|
|
Sunday, December 5th, 2004
|
| Time: | 7:56 am. |
| Mood: |  sympathetically divined. | | Music: | Red Hot Chili Peppers - Don't Forget Me. |
|
I DUNNO IF I'MMA GO TO HER HOUSE.
RICKENBACKER IS SO EXPENSIVELY ELUSIVE.
I'M AT A LOSS AT WHAT I SHOULD PUT TIME INTO.
ALTHOUGH MY OBLIGATIONS ARE THE PRETTY OPTIMAL CHOICE.
GOING THROUGH DRESSPHERES, A FOGGY TOWN, TONS OF RANDOMLY SKINNED VILLAINS, AND FIGHTING WITH PARACELSUS ARE THE MOST FERVENTLY CHOICE CHOICES.
...I fail at grammar.
Goodbye.
|
|
Comments: Add Your Own.
|
|
Saturday, October 9th, 2004
|
| Time: | 6:13 pm. |
| Mood: |  crappy. | | Music: | HELLBOY. |
|
I started playing FFXI again, on Midgard.
Elvaan.
...I'm actually enjoying it.
|
|
Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
|
|
Saturday, October 2nd, 2004
|
|
|
oh yeah, just hit me.
I made a new SN, I wanted to drop the chibi thing. :(
behold Saint Kosaku
right, whatever, it's lame and stupid but I was looking to be entertained
unfortunately I didn't look hard enough
|
|
Comments: Add Your Own.
|
|
Monday, September 27th, 2004
|
| Time: | 6:40 am. |
| Mood: |  #%@$!. | | Music: | Motion City Soundtrack - Capital H. |
|
Star Ocean is amazingly awesome. It kept me from doing my homework which I had to finish up an hour ago. :(
I'm tired, I wanna come home early and take a nap.
k gotta get ready bye
|
|
Comments: Add Your Own.
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
kosaku's journal
chipper.
